We got an email at school to let us know we would have an inspection this school year. Well, we already knew that but have heard that when you get this particular email it means inspection is right around the corner. We have failed the last two years mainly because of student supervision and instruction. Uh, aren't those the main things? At any rate, we have made great improvements and are hopeful for a better score this year. After school I took Millie to have a mani/pedi. She loved it until they were finished with her. She then started to ask when we were going home. She just chatted and made up stories the rest of the time. She used some of the pillows on the benches and acted as if they were her babies. She could play for hours on her own. She talks the entire time and doesn't ask for any response. In fact, sometimes she acts disqusted when I 'interrupt' her by making comment about her babies.
Once home from the mani/pedis it was dinner and bed for the kids and Stuart went off to rugby practice. My back was not much better than the day before so it was an early night for me as well.
Tuesday I woke up and my back was a mess. I always have the pain in the lower left part of my back. I still think this stems from when I was thrown off a horse at camp in my late teens. It gets tweaked every six months or so, but this time was the worst it's ever been.
By the time I got home I had developed muscle cramps. They were so bad that I would compare them to labor contractions. The one that debilitated me was when I was going to the bathroom. It's a lovely story, as you can guess. I pulled down my pants and my back started to spasm. I could do nothing but pee. Lovely! And not humiliating at all. I screamed with so much pain that Millie started crying.
I made my way into the guest bedroom to lay on the bed. I was so uncomfortable and the cramps were taking my breath away. I ended up on the floor and didn't really consider how I would get up. I took a muscle relaxer and thought I would be able to get up soon after. Even 45 minutes after the pill I was spasming as much as before the pill. Because I didn't want the kids at the hospital and Stuart and Jack had rugby practice anyway, Stuart called me a cab and off I went to the hospital.
I had warned the cab driver that I would probably scream at some point in the ride, and I didn't disappoint. Once I was at the hospital I got out of the cab. I had two extreme episodes before I even reached the reception desk. It was horrendous. An orderly finally came over with a wheel chair, took my health card, and then wheeled me back into emergency. I sat waiting for what seemed like hours, but was probably more like 20 minutes. Once I was called into the doctor's area I told him my story. He said he would give me a shot and then send me to X-rays to make sure there wasn't anything wrong inside.
As I was sitting there, after my injection, I messaged Cathy and asked her what she was doing this evening, which really was my probe to see if she could come and get me once I was fixed. She said she was just cooking dinner and then asked me what I was doing. I told her the entire ordeal and naturally she offered to come to the hospital.
By the time she got there I had been wheeled down for an X-ray and had at least 3 more violent contractions/cramps. I had one in the X-ray table and all I could say, after my screaming fit, was 'these suckers are evil!' I think I was making the nurses laugh, at my expense of course.
When I was wheeled out of the X-ray hall I had another cramp, yelled, and then saw Cathy sitting in the waiting area. Her eyes were as giant as saucers. She told me she had never been around someone having labor pains. It was what it looked, sounded and felt like. If I didn't know better I would have thought I was going to give birth any moment. Brutal!
Once back upstairs the doctor seemed puzzled, and actually not very smart. He decided to order an ultrasound because I mentioned something about kidney stones. From everything I had heard, kidney stones produce pain similar to labor pains. I messaged Stuart to tell him this was my thought and then apologize to him for when he had kidney stones and was in excruciating pain, and I may have called him a wuss and been impatient with him.
The ultrasound showed nothing. So back upstairs I went for another consultation with the doctor. Ironically enough the doctor had never witnessed one of my episodes. But just before after he said he would give me an injection that was stronger than the last, my back erupted. I yelled so loud that Cathy said the doctor rushed to his computer to finish up the order of the shot. Even 30 minutes after the last shot I was still a mess. However, once Cathy drove me home the pain had subsided a bit, but not as significantly as I had hoped. I did get a 2 day sick note, so my work week was considered over.
I sat on the sofa once I was home and really just tried to relax to avoid any spasms. Sadly, I had a couple more before I finally went to bed in the guest room. That bed is much firmer than our bed, and it's downstairs, which was better for me. I didn't sleep very well. I was up about 3 times in the night and each time I went to the bathroom. As I sat down my back spasmed. It wasn't as bad, but was still gripping, nonetheless.
Wednesday I did a whole lot of nothing. I did manage to climb the stairs and fold the three loads of laundry Stuart had washed the night before, but that exhausted me and I spent the rest of the day on the sofa. I discovered my new television series, Keeping up with the Kardashians. They are superbly entertaining, and not terribly bright. However, there are 11 seasons so I should stay busy for a while.
Wednesday evening Stuart went to rugby and I was home with the kids. Millie gave me trouble going to bed and my muscle pain started up all over again. The more stressed I got with Millie and her disobedience, the more my back gave me trouble. I finally just told Millie she would have to just put herself to bed. She calmed down eventually and even giggled, then I rocked her and she fell right to sleep.
I slept in the guest room again on Wednesday night because of the firmness of the bed. I had a better night's sleep with me spasms, which was great.
On Thursday morning Kayleigh had told me the principal of Jack's school had mentioned to her that Jack should be moved to the higher grade. Jack had said something to this effect last week and I just told him that wasn't going to happen. However, now that Kayleigh had said it I deceived I would go speak to the principal. Since I was off of school it was very convenient for me to go in. I met with him at 10 am. And as I guessed, he blew smoke up my skirt and said he wouldn't dream of such a thing and would have spoken to me had he considered it. He said that as they have gone through the files they have figured out that some of their students who were at different schools last year were actually placed in the wrong grade level and did have to be moved. Who knows? I just made it very clear that we were not okay with Jack being promoted a grade for any reason.
When I got home from seeing Jack's principal I took a nap. The visit took it out of me.
Thursday evening we just sat around while the kids played outside. Stuart went to the store to buy some much needed items as the fridge was bare. When he returned the kids ate. While he was getting their supper ready the kids and I were outside. The kids had taken out their JDBugs and we're sharing with the neighbors. Millie was being a bit selfish so I called her on it. When I did, she jumped on the JDBug and took off. I must have said her name five or six times trying to get her to come to me. I started to go after her then remembered my back was a mess. When she did finally comply I told her she would go to bed after she ate, which made her flip out a bit. She did, in fact, settle down and accept her consequence. She kept telling me she would do better if I didn't send her to bed early. Stuart explained to her that her behavior needed to be good the first time and then she wouldn't have to go to bed early. She's having difficulty putting those things together.
Friday we got up early and headed to Dubai for Jack's rugby tournament. His first match was at 8:30 am. They played hard but there are just too many 'daisy picking' girls on his team for them to be terribly competitive. I can see it frustrates Jack because of his competitive nature. Next season when he is playing tackle I think there will be more players who are as competitive as he is. The tackling part usually separates the men from the mice. We shall see. He potentially has one more tournament, then the heat will start to pour out again and our after school days will be spent at the pool.
We headed back to Al Ain and were at home for about and hour when Stuart left for the rugby club. He was starting that evening for the 1st team. The guy that normally plays his position has been injured so Stuart has now stepped in. I think he really enjoys it, but it is way more intense than the 2nd team.
In the meantime, while Stuart prepared for his rugby match, I was showering and getting ready for the biggest change in my life. As most of you know, I have struggled with being overweight for most of my life. I have gained and lost the same 60 pounds at least 5 times. For whatever reason, weight has a grip on me that can only be released by doing something drastic and permanent.
So, after a lot of thought and prayer, getting support from my parents and Stuart, I decided that gastric sleeve surgery was my tool to regain my life. I felt I was too young to feel this old. My children are so young and their mother acts so old because my body is starting to fail me, not just old age fails, but over weight fails. My knees, back, and joints are suffering emensely because of the added stress this unneeded 85 pounds puts on my body.
At first I worried what people would think. As much as I pretend others' opinions don't matter to me, rest assured they do, in fact, impact my life decisions incredibly. But after looking at what I would this procedure would give back to me, I decided the only opinions that mattered to me were my family's opinions.
Until you have walked a mile in my shoes, you have difficulty understanding why I would come to such a decision. I have had every judgemental thought that is out there about my decision. I have thought 'You gave up'. How would using a tool to aid better health be giving up? ' you're taking the easy way out'. Trust me, nothing about this process has or will be easy, and it will last the rest of my life. 'This is elective surgery, so why would you do it?' This is preventative surgery in order to avoid other health issues down the line. 'You are cheating'. Cheating death for a few more years with my family? Guilty! 'You have no will power and have failed'. This was the worst one. Then I looked at my life and all the things I have accomplished and decided that if I have failed in one area, then I need to sort it out and finally succeed in that area.
We decided that our kids were too small to understand what was happening and because I had to be in the hospital for three nights they would worry about me if I told them I was having an operation. So we told them I was going with Cathy to Abu Dhabi and I would be back on Monday when they got home from school. They are used to me having girls' weekends so didn't even question it. When I return on Monday, of course I will be sore and they will need to be careful around me. At that time I am going to tell them that I had a procedure done that will make me a healthier mama and will help me to be more active with them. All the details are not necessary at this time. I will share everything one day, but only when they are old enough to understand.
I checked into the hospital on Friday evening. It was a restless night. I had been fasting, with only water to drink, since Wednesday. When I awoke on Saturday they started poking and prodding before I went down to surgery. The surgeon came in around 8:30 and told me I would be the second surgery, at about 10 am. It ended up I didn't go until around 11 am. As I was being wheeled down the nurse who had been so sweet to me said, 'Madam, you will be fine'. That helped easy some of my worries. I knew I was doing this for a positive result but I also knew there was a risk attached to that. As I was awaiting the IV and anesthetic, I was speaking to a man who, ironically enough, was from Tempe, Arizona. Our world is really so small. Even that comforted me.
They wheeled me into the operating room and the next thing I know, I can hear myself groaning and them speaking to me to move over to the next gerny. Coming out of anesthesia is not an easy task. At first I was in a great deal
Of pain, but as I started to move around on Saturday the pain subsided and the only thing that was causing me pain was the incisions and the CO2 they put in your body to expand your chest cavity, making it easier to operate. That caused me to have excess gas which I could not release for the life of me.
I know the hard part is just about to happen as I start this journey of an entirely new way of eating, but I am beyond ready for it. I will write more about my journey as time goes on.
While I was having surgery the kids were being spoiled by friends. They were at the rugby club most of Friday evening, then on Saturday they went to the Richarssons for most of the day. Cathy then took Millie to a birthday party and Jack went to the club to swim with Henry. Stuart got a little free time to himself. He made dinner for Cathy, Kayleigh and the kids.
It seemed that Millie missed me most. Stuart said she climbed in on my side of the bed each night and said, 'I want to sleep on Mama's pillow'.
Sorry this week's post was late, but as you can tell I was a bit preoccupied.
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